14 January 2008

A is for Alpaca

Welcome to the
A Is For Alpaca Alpaca Destash Contest!!

It's a bit daunting to follow Going40's hyper-creative limerick-o-rama, but hey, someone had to do it... Since this is my first contest, starting with "A" just makes sense. And since The Meema Files has mainly centered around the topics of knitting and my daughter, the contest premise combines the two with a creative twist.

If I wrote a children's alphabet book related to knitting, alpaca would be on the first page (because it rocks and je detest angora fluff fibers that end up everywhere). Your job is to create other letter entries in a knit-centric alphabet. "A is for apple, all crunchy and red/ B is for bear, who honeys his bread" but with knitting terms - you get the idea.

Here are the guidelines:
- Please use the English alphabet.
- Specify if your entry is to be considered appropriate for a children's alphabet (G-rated), or one for adults (with saucy senses of humor, of course).
- Relevance to knitting/knitters/yarny things, as well as overall rhyme scheme of multiple sequential letters will be considered in the final evaluation.
- Submissions should be made as comments to THIS blog post.
- Deadline for submissions will be 11:59pm Central time (GMT -6:00) on Monday, January 21, 2008.

And, you might ask, what about the prizes (aside from the deep respect of your fellow blog commenters)? Why, alpaca yarny goodness! Worsted hand-painted, fluffy sport weight, delicate lace weight... yum. The first place entry will have first dibs, then second, and so on. Meema endorses the concept of multiple winners.

Put on your felted thinking caps, and see you at the finish line!

ADDENDUM: A question was raised this evening about the number of letters per submission. The answer - you can enter as few or as many of the 26 as you'd like. A pair of letters (a+b, c+d, ..., w+x, y+z) would serve best for working your rhyming muscles. Want to do the whole series? Be our guest!

13 comments:

Scott said...

A Knitter's Alphabet (an adult knitter, I think, unless the adults in the house are prepared to answer some awkward questions their children may pose)

A is for Argyle, 'cause intarsia is phat,
B is for Bobbin; wind your yarn around that.

C is for Counter, to keep track of each row,
D is for Dale, trusted yarn all Norsks know.

E is for Eyelet, in edging or welting,
F is for Fair Isle, Finished, or Felting.

G is for Gauge: get it wrong and you're screwed,
H is for Handspun: never spin in the nude.

I is for Increase, in hat, scarf, or mitten,
J is for Jumper, or sweater in Britain.

Ktbl: Knit through back of the loop,
L is Latrine; yes, I knit while I poop.

M's Malabrigo, spun by women in Uruguay,
N is for Needles, so expensive; don't know why.

O is for Orange, a color hard to get right,
P is for Pattern, for knitters uptight.

Q is for Qiviut, expensive but soft,
R is for Roving; raw wool gives yarn loft.

S is for Slip-stitch, intended or not,
T is for Turbo: fast needles are hot.

U is for Ugly, (some knitters' taste could be better),
V is for Vest, a V-neck-ed sweater.

W is Worsted, a yarn weight well-worn,
X is X-rated: yarn's better than porn.

Y is The Yarnery, a favorite store,
Z is for Zimmerman, knitting queen evermore.

deb said...

...gasping...

OK, you win.

This list is so good, it was actually worth it that you totally blew off work today to write it. When Iambia, the bastard child of Euterpe, is with us, she rules, and we are but helpless, rhyming putty in her hands.

Mark said...

huh. I'm not sure I should even try...

deb said...

I think there's a book in this blog. The Illustrated Knitter's Alphabet. It would be a point-of-purchase impulse buy at every LYS in the known world.

There could even be a tactile homage to "Pat the Bunny" on some pages.

And now read it again, and just *think* of the photo opportunities.

hahahahahahahaha

MamaMay said...

Wow looking at the first poster I have to think that he has it won!

My personal one would be:

b is for Baby
c is for cashmere or child
d is for dye
e ???
f is for free

I don't know the rest.

Sharon Rose said...

Was going to enter this but Scott has already kicked our collective butts. Go Scott!

cthulhulovesme said...

L is for Llama, both ornery and spitty,
M is for Moths, which lead to insanity.


..I don't think I can compete with a whole alphabet on the first post. *grins*

Turtle said...

Ok, how can we compete with Scott on this! He ruled right from the start! Lol, I agree with the illustrated book idea, with sketches kind of "Edward Gorey-ish". Scott dud , we bow down to you!

squiggi said...

Wow, I bow to scott..
I'm not worthy.....
but I'll give it a try.
I decided to take a different tack with it, yarn favorites:

A alchemy yarns
b blue moon fiber arts
c chameleon colorworks
d dream in color
e etsy
f fiber oasis
g garn studios
h halcyon yarns
I interlacements
j jaeger hand knits
k kanine knits
l lily chin
m magknits
n needle beetle
o opal
p project spectrum
q quirky violet (on etsy)
r rio de la plata
s sundara yarns
t tsock tsarina
u universal
v vickie howell
w weaving works
x
y yarn pirate
z zitron
:)

monica said...

Okay, here's my shot, completely kid friendly:

A is for Afghan, knit by my grandmother,
B is for Booties, for my baby brother.

C is for Circular knitting - it rocks!
D is for Darning the holes in my socks.

E is for Ease - Is my sweater too tight?
F is for Frogging it if it's not right.

G is for Garter, my favorite stitch,
H is for Hats that are warm and don't itch!

I is for Interweave, which I can't resist,
J is for Join, making sure not to twist.

K is for KNITTING! It's so fun to do!
L is for Lace that you can see through.

M is for Mistakes that will be okay,
N is for Niddy noddy, 'cause it's fun to say!

O is for "One size fits all" - never true!
P is for Picot, Pompoms, and Purls, too.

Q is for Quick knits, with yarn that is fat,
R is for Ravelry; "Where my stitches at?"

S is for Skeins that are simply sublime,
T is for Tinking one stitch at a time.

U is for "Uh-oh, this doesn't look right."
V is for . . . V! What each knit stitch looks like.

W is for all of the Wool that I own,
X is for X-ray; knitting's in my bones.

Y is for Yarn, what knitting's all about,
and Z is for Zipper; and now I'm all out.

Sorry if it's a little rough, Scott set the bar extremely high!

sjmercure said...

okay, here's my contribution: (slightly PG-13 rated)

A is for advanced, something I'm not.
B is for blocking, whether a sweater or sock.

C is for cables, some small, some fat.
D is for D*mn, my yarn became a victim of my cat.

E is for extra, as in stitches I've got.
F is for frogging, I get extras a lot.

G is for gauge, it can cause me to age.
H is for hooch, for when knitting drives me to rage.

I is for idiot, which sometimes I feel.
J is for joy, Look! I turned a heel!

K is for knit, more fun than purl.
L is for lost stitch, makes me want to hurl.

M is for Make one, occasionally on both sides.
N is for not much, asked how much I've spent on yarn, sometimes I've lied.

O is for object, finished or un.
P is for project, boy this sure is fun!

Q is for quick, mittens, scarves and hats.
R is for reevaluate, the adoption of the yarnball chasing cat.

S is for SEX, Stash Enhancement eXpedition.
T is for trip, to gain more yarn attrition.

U is for unstoppable, knitting is such an addiciton
V is for vowing, when my friends vow to give me a knitting intervention.

W is for weather, Oh good, it's snowing, I can stay home and knit.
X is for Xstatic, my hand knit gift was a hit!

Y is for yelp, I stabbed myself with a needle, now go get help!
Z is for the zzz's I can get, after a project well knit.

ikkinlala said...

Here's mine (which is G-rated):

A's for alpaca, soft on my skin;
B is for boxes to store my yarn in.

C is for counting to help make things fit;
D is for dish cloths, a relaxing knit.

E's for enjoyment when knitting goes right;
F is for frogging when it's more of a fight.

G is for gauge (or sometimes for guess);
H is for handspun I like to caress.

I's for intarsia I know little about;
J is for joining when my yarn runs out.

K is for Kitchener, which makes some annoyed;
L is for ladders I try to avoid.

M is for magazines: fun, but expensive;
N is for needles, a collection extensive.

O is for Orenburg, a Russian tradition;
P's for pi, both for knitters and mathematicians.

Q is for questions about each knitting task;
R is for Ravelry, a good place to ask.

S is for socks, my latest addiction;
T is for tension (tightness, not friction).

U's for unfinished objects (I have more than one);
V is for victory when they're finally done.

W is for wool, which I've loved from the start;
X is for Xerox, so I can write on my chart.

Y is for yards: how much yarn have I got?
Z is for zeal - knitters have a lot.

Put a Sock in it said...

I'd say it's suitable for all ages. :)

A is for Aran, a yarn weight or sweater;
B is for Blocking, to size garments better.

C is for Crochet Hook (see what comes next);
D is for Dropped Stitch, that leaves knitters vexed.

E is for Eunny Jang's Endpaper Mitts;
F is for Fetching, that everyone knits.

G is for Gifts that you foist on your bloke;
H is for Hemp, that's to knit, not to smoke!

I is for I-cord, on edging or strap;
J is for Just One More Row, then a nap.

K is for KIPing -- show off with panache;
L is for LYS, gets all your cash.

M is for Marker, to mark a repeat;
N is for Needles -- without them, you're beat!

O is for Overdye, choose your own colour;
P is for Purling, the stitch that is duller!

Q is Qiviut, if you can pay!
R is for Ravelry, wastes your whole day.

S is for Stash, you just can't have enough;
T is for Toe-Ups that end at the cuff.

U is for Unpicking all your mistakes;
V is for Vintage Knits -- heirloom keepsakes.

W's for Washing, you'll need to take care;
X is for Xanax (don't pull out your hair).

Y is for Yarn Over, lace-knitting rocks;
Z is for Zwerger Garn Opal for socks.